The Secret to a Happy Life

HEY everyone. So it has been a while since my last post. A lot has gone on between now and the last blog, BUT as I like to say I AM GOOD, ALL is well.  We are experiencing some tough times as a nation. There are a lot of people out of work and those who are working most of them feel like they never have enough to do what they need to do nor what they would like to do. My husband and I are not immune to the state of the world right now. You know I think that some people think that because I don't complain and don't walk around talking about my problems all the time that I don't have any. That is far from the truth. My husband and I we have issues that arise in our lives. We have things that come up in our finances, in the church with members, in our marriage, with our loved ones. We have problems, it's just I have LEARNED to be content. I have learned to be appreciative for what I have and the good that God is doing in my life. That is a simple truth but such a LIFE CHANGING one.

 I was thinking today about grace, and honestly grace hasn't changed my financial picture. We still have times where we are short and don't have enough, where we don't know how something is going to get paid. That used to happen prior to me knowing about grace. So I can't say grace changed that......but what I can say is grace changed ME. I am different now when I experience times like that. I am not saying that I don't have times where I feel over whelmed BUT they don't last long. I have learned how to not worry and keep living and enjoying life in spite of my challenges. That makes such a difference in my life. We can't do anything about situations by worrying. It doesn't help or change anything. All it does is make us sick and look older :-). Stress brings on all kinds of sickness and truthfully we have a lot that we can stress over. Everybody has some problem or issue that can cause them to worry and live in fear. We all have problems, we all have cares. Life is hard sometimes and it will zap and drain all your joy if you let it. It has a way of knocking you down BUT through it all GOD IS ALWAYS THERE.....and it is so important that you realize that. He is ALWAYS doing something in your life. If you examine your life you have plenty to be thankful for.

That is what contentment is........ being grateful and satisfied with what you have. Taking the time to ENJOY what you have. So many of us let what we don't have stop us from enjoying what we DO have....and that is a miserable way to live.   Focusing on the bad in everything will cause you to be depressed and angry all the time........ AND it doesn't change ANYTHING.  God will still keep you but you will be one miserable kept person. That is no way to live. That isn't living at all. It is better to allow God to keep you and you enjoy the ride along the way.  The secret to a happy life is taking the time to be CONTENT.....satisfied and grateful for what you have. Paul had to learn this meaning it doesn't come naturally but as you get in the habit of doing it, it will become second nature and you will look up and find that your days of fear and worry have been replaced by days of peace and joy. ILUVMESUMU!!!!!!! Be blessed :-)
Eboni
http://www.thetotalvictoryexperience.com/

HEY everyone. So it has been a while since my last post. A lot has gone on between now and the last blog, BUT as I like to say I AM GOOD, ALL is well.  We are experiencing some tough times as a nation. There are a lot of people out of work and those who are working most of them feel like they never have enough to do what they need to do nor what they would like to do. My husband and I are not immune to the state of the world right now. You know I think that some people think that because I don't complain and don't walk around talking about my problems all the time that I don't have any. That is far from the truth. My husband and I we have issues that arise in our lives. We have things that come up in our finances, in the church with members, in our marriage, with our loved ones. We have problems, it's just I have LEARNED to be content. I have learned to be appreciative for what I have and the good that God is doing in my life. That is a simple truth but such a LIFE CHANGING one.

 I was thinking today about grace, and honestly grace hasn't changed my financial picture. We still have times where we are short and don't have enough, where we don't know how something is going to get paid. That used to happen prior to me knowing about grace. So I can't say grace changed that......but what I can say is grace changed ME. I am different now when I experience times like that. I am not saying that I don't have times where I feel over whelmed BUT they don't last long. I have learned how to not worry and keep living and enjoying life in spite of my challenges. That makes such a difference in my life. We can't do anything about situations by worrying. It doesn't help or change anything. All it does is make us sick and look older :-). Stress brings on all kinds of sickness and truthfully we have a lot that we can stress over. Everybody has some problem or issue that can cause them to worry and live in fear. We all have problems, we all have cares. Life is hard sometimes and it will zap and drain all your joy if you let it. It has a way of knocking you down BUT through it all GOD IS ALWAYS THERE.....and it is so important that you realize that. He is ALWAYS doing something in your life. If you examine your life you have plenty to be thankful for.

That is what contentment is........ being grateful and satisfied with what you have. Taking the time to ENJOY what you have. So many of us let what we don't have stop us from enjoying what we DO have....and that is a miserable way to live.   Focusing on the bad in everything will cause you to be depressed and angry all the time........ AND it doesn't change ANYTHING.  God will still keep you but you will be one miserable kept person. That is no way to live. That isn't living at all. It is better to allow God to keep you and you enjoy the ride along the way.  The secret to a happy life is taking the time to be CONTENT.....satisfied and grateful for what you have. Paul had to learn this meaning it doesn't come naturally but as you get in the habit of doing it, it will become second nature and you will look up and find that your days of fear and worry have been replaced by days of peace and joy. ILUVMESUMU!!!!!!! Be blessed :-)
Eboni
http://www.thetotalvictoryexperience.com/

I am Seriously a Daydreamer.

OK so I have been daydreaming again and a lot lately. I am a serious daydreamer. I envision my future and things that I want to take place in my future. I have sooooo many words and prophecies that God has spoken to me about my life and my family. Things that have yet to come to pass in full. Parts of them have begun but they haven't fully happened yet. So I do something that I call "see with my heart". Often times when I look at my life through the eyes of the word or through the eyes of what God has spoken those things haven't fully happened yet. Well, in order to hang on to those words especially in hard times I spend a lot of time "seeing with my heart". Mostly it is early in the morning when I wake up before I get out of bed. I will lay in bed and travel to my future in my mind. Let me give you an example. One of the things that I know that my husband and I will experience is debt freedom. I KNOW we will be wealthy and debt free. How do I know? God told me.

There was a time when I was behind on my car. Not the car I have now but the one I had prior to this car. Things were slow at the church and we wouldn't get paid a lot. My husband would forgo his salary so we could pay the obligations at the church. As a result our personal obligations often went lacking. My particular car company was AWFUL. They were mean, rude and down right demonic if you ask me. lol They would say the most awful things. But anyway, I thought I deserved that treatment. I thought I deserved them talking to me like that because I was late. I hadn't paid my bill and I did sign the contract. One day I was praying and the Lord gave me a revelation. He said to me "Eboni you do deserve that. You are late and haven't paid your bill BUT I ransomed you from that. I gave my life for your bad decisions and poor financial choices." I gave my life to free you even from debt (scriptural ref. 2 Cor. 8:9 and Matt: 20:28). Well right now we are not debt free but that day I received that word I literally RECEIVED that word. I began to see myself as debt free. Our financial picture has gotten better every year but we aren't totally out of debt. Thank God I don't have that car. I traded it in and got a better car at a better interest rate and totally better deal and we have not been late at all. So we are progressing as I said.

At the time though when I received the word we were behind on most of our bills. So I would close my eyes and  imagine myself debt free. I would imagine us paying our bills on time and having enough to do the things we needed to do. I would day dream and see the church filled and just see all of the things that God had promised me in my mind. I used my imagination to SEE myself living in the promises of God. I would  DAYDREAM :-).

Well I am daydreaming AGAIN Honey and If I were to take the time and give you all a glimpse into me and my husband's future it is a powerful thing. Like I said God has spoken some awesome things to me. Daydreaming allows me to see with my heart as opposed to looking at my natural circumstances. When I do that it keeps me in faith. I have been stirred up so much lately. Maybe one day I will share with the world what I see but I don't feel lead to do that just yet. I will encourage you though to try it. Try "seeing with your heart". Seeing yourself in a successful career, or happy marriage, debt free, your children home. Try seeing yourself HAPPY, enjoying life. Try imagining you succeeding on your job. If you are jobless try seeing yourself waking up getting dressed and going to work. See yourself in your business suit with your brief case on the elevator. If you are in school see yourself graduating or getting the paper back with a big fat red A+. Take some time to see with your heart.

God gives us imaginations to propel our faith. He told Abraham to look at the stars and the sands of the sea and imagine himself as the father of many. I paraphrased but you get the point. Dream again. Don't give up on your dreams or the words God has given you. Until you see them actually happening in the natural SEE them with your heart on the canvas of your imagination. I promise you it is a powerful thing.

I am going to borrow this saying from Taraji P. Henson ILUVMESUMU ( I love me some you ;-)!!!! Until Next time,
Foreverforgiven1

OK so I have been daydreaming again and a lot lately. I am a serious daydreamer. I envision my future and things that I want to take place in my future. I have sooooo many words and prophecies that God has spoken to me about my life and my family. Things that have yet to come to pass in full. Parts of them have begun but they haven't fully happened yet. So I do something that I call "see with my heart". Often times when I look at my life through the eyes of the word or through the eyes of what God has spoken those things haven't fully happened yet. Well, in order to hang on to those words especially in hard times I spend a lot of time "seeing with my heart". Mostly it is early in the morning when I wake up before I get out of bed. I will lay in bed and travel to my future in my mind. Let me give you an example. One of the things that I know that my husband and I will experience is debt freedom. I KNOW we will be wealthy and debt free. How do I know? God told me.

There was a time when I was behind on my car. Not the car I have now but the one I had prior to this car. Things were slow at the church and we wouldn't get paid a lot. My husband would forgo his salary so we could pay the obligations at the church. As a result our personal obligations often went lacking. My particular car company was AWFUL. They were mean, rude and down right demonic if you ask me. lol They would say the most awful things. But anyway, I thought I deserved that treatment. I thought I deserved them talking to me like that because I was late. I hadn't paid my bill and I did sign the contract. One day I was praying and the Lord gave me a revelation. He said to me "Eboni you do deserve that. You are late and haven't paid your bill BUT I ransomed you from that. I gave my life for your bad decisions and poor financial choices." I gave my life to free you even from debt (scriptural ref. 2 Cor. 8:9 and Matt: 20:28). Well right now we are not debt free but that day I received that word I literally RECEIVED that word. I began to see myself as debt free. Our financial picture has gotten better every year but we aren't totally out of debt. Thank God I don't have that car. I traded it in and got a better car at a better interest rate and totally better deal and we have not been late at all. So we are progressing as I said.

At the time though when I received the word we were behind on most of our bills. So I would close my eyes and  imagine myself debt free. I would imagine us paying our bills on time and having enough to do the things we needed to do. I would day dream and see the church filled and just see all of the things that God had promised me in my mind. I used my imagination to SEE myself living in the promises of God. I would  DAYDREAM :-).

Well I am daydreaming AGAIN Honey and If I were to take the time and give you all a glimpse into me and my husband's future it is a powerful thing. Like I said God has spoken some awesome things to me. Daydreaming allows me to see with my heart as opposed to looking at my natural circumstances. When I do that it keeps me in faith. I have been stirred up so much lately. Maybe one day I will share with the world what I see but I don't feel lead to do that just yet. I will encourage you though to try it. Try "seeing with your heart". Seeing yourself in a successful career, or happy marriage, debt free, your children home. Try seeing yourself HAPPY, enjoying life. Try imagining you succeeding on your job. If you are jobless try seeing yourself waking up getting dressed and going to work. See yourself in your business suit with your brief case on the elevator. If you are in school see yourself graduating or getting the paper back with a big fat red A+. Take some time to see with your heart.

God gives us imaginations to propel our faith. He told Abraham to look at the stars and the sands of the sea and imagine himself as the father of many. I paraphrased but you get the point. Dream again. Don't give up on your dreams or the words God has given you. Until you see them actually happening in the natural SEE them with your heart on the canvas of your imagination. I promise you it is a powerful thing.

I am going to borrow this saying from Taraji P. Henson ILUVMESUMU ( I love me some you ;-)!!!! Until Next time,
Foreverforgiven1

Could it be, have I gained weight?

OK so lately I have been noticing my clothes fitting different. They are fitting a little more snug. So I have been asking my husband over the last few months, "Honey, am I bigger? Am I gaining weight," and of course being the great husband that he is his answer is always, "no, you look fine to me, I like your size, you look the same." Now either he really hasn't noticed or he is really smart and knows to answer no even if he has noticed. He may not have noticed but I have, and the scale doesn't lie. So I step on to weigh my self after thinking for a few weeks that I am bigger and sure enough I am. Ten, YES TEN pounds heavier than I was two years ago, and 5 lbs heavier than I was last year. So instead of going down like I wanted when I supposedly started to watch what I ate last year, I have gone up. Now I know some of you may be thinking well it's only 10 lbs but 10 will turn into 15 and 15 will turn into 20 and that is exactly what I don't want.

I have always been conscious about my weight because obesity runs in my family and I want to break the cycle of obesity and health related problems for my daughter. I want her to see an example of someone different and I want to be able to be active with my kids as they get older. Play basketball, ride bikes with them, swim and interact with them so it has always been a goal of mine to stay fit. Also, I want to remain attractive for my husband. He married me a certain way and I think it's unfair to turn into a whole different person because of a large amount of weight gain, so I have always worked out. Now here is my problem......watching what I put in my mouth. I see now after turning 30 that I can't eat whatever I want any longer. I tend to cook fairly healthy its the SNACKING that does me in. I am a chip queen Honey and chocolate lover. So those things combined with eating late at night I think have taken there toll on my waist line. So I am officially turning over a new leaf. I said that I was on a Journey and I would let my blog followers watch God move in my life. Well, I have petitioned him to help me in my weight and with my lack of discipline. And boy does He have a job ahead of him. I have two bad habits that with his help I have to break. SNACKING and snacking late. Like right now I am tempted to go and get a snack at 11:13pm, BUT I won't I am blogging about it instead.

 My plan isn't to go on some extreme diet that I won't be able to maintain long term. I have found that once you return to your regular eating patterns all the weight if not more comes back. Instead my plan is to make better choices. I will not cut out snacks all together nor will I deprive myself, but I will develop better habits. It will take discipline but I am up for the challenge and I will keep you guys posted on my progress. So I invite you to join me. Let's go on this journey together. If you want to be a trail blazer in your family to win the battle over the bulge let's do it together. There is strength in numbers. We can do it. With the help of the Holy Spirit I WILL do it. Will you join me?

OK so lately I have been noticing my clothes fitting different. They are fitting a little more snug. So I have been asking my husband over the last few months, "Honey, am I bigger? Am I gaining weight," and of course being the great husband that he is his answer is always, "no, you look fine to me, I like your size, you look the same." Now either he really hasn't noticed or he is really smart and knows to answer no even if he has noticed. He may not have noticed but I have, and the scale doesn't lie. So I step on to weigh my self after thinking for a few weeks that I am bigger and sure enough I am. Ten, YES TEN pounds heavier than I was two years ago, and 5 lbs heavier than I was last year. So instead of going down like I wanted when I supposedly started to watch what I ate last year, I have gone up. Now I know some of you may be thinking well it's only 10 lbs but 10 will turn into 15 and 15 will turn into 20 and that is exactly what I don't want.

I have always been conscious about my weight because obesity runs in my family and I want to break the cycle of obesity and health related problems for my daughter. I want her to see an example of someone different and I want to be able to be active with my kids as they get older. Play basketball, ride bikes with them, swim and interact with them so it has always been a goal of mine to stay fit. Also, I want to remain attractive for my husband. He married me a certain way and I think it's unfair to turn into a whole different person because of a large amount of weight gain, so I have always worked out. Now here is my problem......watching what I put in my mouth. I see now after turning 30 that I can't eat whatever I want any longer. I tend to cook fairly healthy its the SNACKING that does me in. I am a chip queen Honey and chocolate lover. So those things combined with eating late at night I think have taken there toll on my waist line. So I am officially turning over a new leaf. I said that I was on a Journey and I would let my blog followers watch God move in my life. Well, I have petitioned him to help me in my weight and with my lack of discipline. And boy does He have a job ahead of him. I have two bad habits that with his help I have to break. SNACKING and snacking late. Like right now I am tempted to go and get a snack at 11:13pm, BUT I won't I am blogging about it instead.

 My plan isn't to go on some extreme diet that I won't be able to maintain long term. I have found that once you return to your regular eating patterns all the weight if not more comes back. Instead my plan is to make better choices. I will not cut out snacks all together nor will I deprive myself, but I will develop better habits. It will take discipline but I am up for the challenge and I will keep you guys posted on my progress. So I invite you to join me. Let's go on this journey together. If you want to be a trail blazer in your family to win the battle over the bulge let's do it together. There is strength in numbers. We can do it. With the help of the Holy Spirit I WILL do it. Will you join me?

What Is Really Going On In Our Marriage?

Hello everyone. I hope that as you are reading this you are having a good day or good evening. My prayer is that you are experiencing peace. The subject on my heart right now is marriage. Probably because my husband and I are Pastors and we deal with this issue a lot in our day to day life. We counsel and offer support and a listening ear to so many couples.  I always find myself really hoping that the couples work out their differences and reach a place of happiness in their lives together.

John and I have been married for 12 years and trust me it has not been and isn't always a bed of roses. Overall though, we have a really good marriage. Trust me in marriage you are going to make some mistakes. That's why I think the most important trait you can adapt in a marriage is a forgiving heart. Especially as women. We have to learn how to forgive and be peace makers.

I am definitely the peace maker in my house. I am married to a man's man. He is very stubborn and set in his ways. I am so thankful for his relationship with Christ because prior to him giving his heart to Jesus he was 10 x's worse. I mean we were married a whole year and he never apologized and when I say never  I mean NEVER. We would argue and he would just go on and I would always be the one going to him saying I am sorry in an effort to make peace. He would accept my apology and we would move on. In my mind though I would be thinking " now this joker owes me an apology too, I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING", but he never would. I will say he has changed and he apologizes more quickly now, but that has been a process. Even through that I don't remember ever having a guard up or a thick shell with him. I have always been the softer one. I notice a lot of the women today are so hard. They are hard in the relationship and have this independent mindset. They have this independent,  excuse my language, "n*gga I don't need you attitude", which they carry that into their marriages. I have always been one to believe that it is okay to be the softer or what today's woman might call the "weaker" person in the relationship. In my experience the marriages that last the longest and have the most peace are the ones where the women allow their husbands to be the MAN.

The bible says blessed are the peace makers for they shall be called children of God. As women I think it is an honor to be a peace maker, soft with your mate. A man doesn't want to feel like he is married to another man, someone who will cuss him like a dude, fight him like a dude, be as tough as a dude. We can diffuse a situation by humbling ourselves and being soft. Especially when we know the man is angry or to a certain point. As women we know how to push a man's buttons. Trust me I know what buttons to push with John. I know what to say and not say to him. I know him, so I know what is going to set him off. When we argue (yes Pastors argue too lol). When we argue I don't say certain things. I had to learn him and have made mistakes but once I learned something will set him off I don't say it. I am quick to apologize and break the silence barrier after an argument. I let my guard down with him and risk being the "weaker" person but it pays off. As women I think we have the ability to keep down a lot of arguments in our homes just by being willing to be softer with our men. We can't make them feel like we don't need them and they aren't anything. I am sorry a man has to feel like a man, and he wants to feel like a man from HIS woman. I think God created us like that. So I said all this to say...... I believe if we as women were willing to take the low road (which is really the high road) we could have much more peace in our relationships.

Now if you are reading this thinking I am whipped lol, that's fine, think that all day; but let me give you some insight into my life. I have been married 12 years. I am married to a man who will buy me anything I want, he doesn't make me work and even when I work my money is my money. He doesn't require me to pay any bills in this house. He has never called me out my name, and we don't get physical even in heated arguments. He has never hit me and I have never hit him. We never have silent treatments that last for more than an hour or two, and we are at peace with one another more than we argue. So If you can't say the same is true for your marriage then MAYBE, just MAYBE, I know a little about what I am talking about. :-). Trust me I am writing this with love because I want to see married couples having more days of peace with one another and this is a small habit that we can develope as women that would make a huge difference. So ladies I hope you still love me. :-) If you don't when you try this and notice a difference you will love me a lot more ;-).

Hello everyone. I hope that as you are reading this you are having a good day or good evening. My prayer is that you are experiencing peace. The subject on my heart right now is marriage. Probably because my husband and I are Pastors and we deal with this issue a lot in our day to day life. We counsel and offer support and a listening ear to so many couples.  I always find myself really hoping that the couples work out their differences and reach a place of happiness in their lives together.

John and I have been married for 12 years and trust me it has not been and isn't always a bed of roses. Overall though, we have a really good marriage. Trust me in marriage you are going to make some mistakes. That's why I think the most important trait you can adapt in a marriage is a forgiving heart. Especially as women. We have to learn how to forgive and be peace makers.

I am definitely the peace maker in my house. I am married to a man's man. He is very stubborn and set in his ways. I am so thankful for his relationship with Christ because prior to him giving his heart to Jesus he was 10 x's worse. I mean we were married a whole year and he never apologized and when I say never  I mean NEVER. We would argue and he would just go on and I would always be the one going to him saying I am sorry in an effort to make peace. He would accept my apology and we would move on. In my mind though I would be thinking " now this joker owes me an apology too, I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING", but he never would. I will say he has changed and he apologizes more quickly now, but that has been a process. Even through that I don't remember ever having a guard up or a thick shell with him. I have always been the softer one. I notice a lot of the women today are so hard. They are hard in the relationship and have this independent mindset. They have this independent,  excuse my language, "n*gga I don't need you attitude", which they carry that into their marriages. I have always been one to believe that it is okay to be the softer or what today's woman might call the "weaker" person in the relationship. In my experience the marriages that last the longest and have the most peace are the ones where the women allow their husbands to be the MAN.

The bible says blessed are the peace makers for they shall be called children of God. As women I think it is an honor to be a peace maker, soft with your mate. A man doesn't want to feel like he is married to another man, someone who will cuss him like a dude, fight him like a dude, be as tough as a dude. We can diffuse a situation by humbling ourselves and being soft. Especially when we know the man is angry or to a certain point. As women we know how to push a man's buttons. Trust me I know what buttons to push with John. I know what to say and not say to him. I know him, so I know what is going to set him off. When we argue (yes Pastors argue too lol). When we argue I don't say certain things. I had to learn him and have made mistakes but once I learned something will set him off I don't say it. I am quick to apologize and break the silence barrier after an argument. I let my guard down with him and risk being the "weaker" person but it pays off. As women I think we have the ability to keep down a lot of arguments in our homes just by being willing to be softer with our men. We can't make them feel like we don't need them and they aren't anything. I am sorry a man has to feel like a man, and he wants to feel like a man from HIS woman. I think God created us like that. So I said all this to say...... I believe if we as women were willing to take the low road (which is really the high road) we could have much more peace in our relationships.

Now if you are reading this thinking I am whipped lol, that's fine, think that all day; but let me give you some insight into my life. I have been married 12 years. I am married to a man who will buy me anything I want, he doesn't make me work and even when I work my money is my money. He doesn't require me to pay any bills in this house. He has never called me out my name, and we don't get physical even in heated arguments. He has never hit me and I have never hit him. We never have silent treatments that last for more than an hour or two, and we are at peace with one another more than we argue. So If you can't say the same is true for your marriage then MAYBE, just MAYBE, I know a little about what I am talking about. :-). Trust me I am writing this with love because I want to see married couples having more days of peace with one another and this is a small habit that we can develope as women that would make a huge difference. So ladies I hope you still love me. :-) If you don't when you try this and notice a difference you will love me a lot more ;-).

Eat, Pray, Love

So today I went with a friend of mine to see the movie" Eat, Pray, Love". It was a pretty good movie. I will say definitely a chick flick and to some, as my husband would say it may be "eyeball fall out boring". He says the movies I watch are shoot yourself boring. Well, I was intrigued by the concept of this movie when I saw the previews. The idea of being able to take a year off from life, travel and enjoy life, drew me in. Especially because of where I was in my life when I first saw the preview a few months back.

Some of you may not know but I am married to a Pastor. He is 33 and I am 31 and we do NOT live the life of a 30 year old. We have soooooo much responsibility on our shoulders, responsibility and pressure. Actually doing this job makes me respect exactly what Jesus accomplished. He was our age and had literally the weight of the world on his shoulders. Anyway, back to the movie. When I saw the preview I wanted to see it because at the time I wasn't enjoying life. I was bored, bored with the mundane of life. I was caught up in the day to day process of living and paying bills. (Let me put this disclaimer in here for my husband, TECHNICALLY I don't pay the bills he does, BUT......you get what I mean) LOL. Even as Pastors we can get so busy with the day to day of being a pastor, the business and behind the scenes of it all, that we get off focus of what's important. Thankfully God ministered to me and I am not in that place anymore.

So Liz (the character in the movie), realizes that she is unhappy and sets off to find herself. I actually think that is true of soooo many women. We either loose ourselves in our husbands, or life, raising a family, our jobs, you name it. Now I don't advocate taking a year off from life because we have people depending on us, BUT I am all for finding our true selves. Getting to know us.

I had gotten out of touch with me, kind of lost myself in John, my family, and my role as a wife and mother. Don't get me wrong my husband and children are the most important people to me, but I realized that I don't have to loose ME, Eboni in fulfilling those roles. So I started on purpose taking time to do things that I enjoy. Listening to music, singing at the top of my breath......(when no one is around of course), going out with friends. Friendships are so important and for awhile I had stopped investing in personal relationships. I realize now that I need girlfriends, people I can talk to, laugh and vent with. God places people in our lives as a blessing so I started to take time out to nurture these relationships. I reached out to friends from the past thanks to Face Book lol, and even made a new friend.

The point I am making is when I lost me, I stopped enjoying life. Everything isn't perfect in my life not by far, BUT there are a lot of GOOD things, blessings that I have, and when I began to on purpose take time to enjoy these blessings, even enjoy me, guess what........ I actually began to ENJOY LIFE!!!!

So today I went with a friend of mine to see the movie" Eat, Pray, Love". It was a pretty good movie. I will say definitely a chick flick and to some, as my husband would say it may be "eyeball fall out boring". He says the movies I watch are shoot yourself boring. Well, I was intrigued by the concept of this movie when I saw the previews. The idea of being able to take a year off from life, travel and enjoy life, drew me in. Especially because of where I was in my life when I first saw the preview a few months back.

Some of you may not know but I am married to a Pastor. He is 33 and I am 31 and we do NOT live the life of a 30 year old. We have soooooo much responsibility on our shoulders, responsibility and pressure. Actually doing this job makes me respect exactly what Jesus accomplished. He was our age and had literally the weight of the world on his shoulders. Anyway, back to the movie. When I saw the preview I wanted to see it because at the time I wasn't enjoying life. I was bored, bored with the mundane of life. I was caught up in the day to day process of living and paying bills. (Let me put this disclaimer in here for my husband, TECHNICALLY I don't pay the bills he does, BUT......you get what I mean) LOL. Even as Pastors we can get so busy with the day to day of being a pastor, the business and behind the scenes of it all, that we get off focus of what's important. Thankfully God ministered to me and I am not in that place anymore.

So Liz (the character in the movie), realizes that she is unhappy and sets off to find herself. I actually think that is true of soooo many women. We either loose ourselves in our husbands, or life, raising a family, our jobs, you name it. Now I don't advocate taking a year off from life because we have people depending on us, BUT I am all for finding our true selves. Getting to know us.

I had gotten out of touch with me, kind of lost myself in John, my family, and my role as a wife and mother. Don't get me wrong my husband and children are the most important people to me, but I realized that I don't have to loose ME, Eboni in fulfilling those roles. So I started on purpose taking time to do things that I enjoy. Listening to music, singing at the top of my breath......(when no one is around of course), going out with friends. Friendships are so important and for awhile I had stopped investing in personal relationships. I realize now that I need girlfriends, people I can talk to, laugh and vent with. God places people in our lives as a blessing so I started to take time out to nurture these relationships. I reached out to friends from the past thanks to Face Book lol, and even made a new friend.

The point I am making is when I lost me, I stopped enjoying life. Everything isn't perfect in my life not by far, BUT there are a lot of GOOD things, blessings that I have, and when I began to on purpose take time to enjoy these blessings, even enjoy me, guess what........ I actually began to ENJOY LIFE!!!!

Who AM I?

So who am I? Well I am still figuring that one out. Some of the answer to that question I know and some of it I am still learning. Actually discovering would be a better word. I discover more about myself every day. I am a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. I am so many things. I love music all kinds. I love LOVE. So I love love songs and movies. Whether it is love songs about my heavenly father or love music about a mate. I love love and the idea of being in love and loving others. I am a happy ending, glass half full type of girl. Hopeful romantic.

I am so thankful for grace because religion will have you cut out all music that isn't "gospel" when in actuality a lot of the so called "gospel" music isn't gospel. If it isn't talking about Jesus and what he did for us or who we are in him then it can't be classified as "gospel". LOL It can be classified inspirational, but not "gospel".

So back to telling you about me. I am a woman on a journey. Discovering who I am, who I was created to be, The REAL me. I have so many roles, but I am learning that if I allow God into every area of my life, share everything with him, not just the spiritual stuff, BUT everything.........only then I can really experience HIM as God. If we just give our good sides our so called "holy" sides to God then we don't fully get to experience him as God and we miss out on the best part of Him. The loving, always accepting, forgiving, patient side of him. Forgiveness is freeing. Acceptance is freeing and I am enjoying that freedom.

Life doesn't happen within the four walls of a church. Life happens everyday and if we think that the only way we can have relationship with God is when we are praying or doing something that is so called "holy".... then we miss out on so much with him.

So right now I am at a place where I am enjoying life. Things don't always happen as I expected but God is always there with me bringing about good in my life. I am taking time to be grateful and enjoy what he has blessed me with. I also discovered something about myself which I will share on the next blog post......for now I was answering the question WHO AM I? Well I am ME. Loved by God and forgiven. And that's the best place I can be. :-)

So who am I? Well I am still figuring that one out. Some of the answer to that question I know and some of it I am still learning. Actually discovering would be a better word. I discover more about myself every day. I am a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. I am so many things. I love music all kinds. I love LOVE. So I love love songs and movies. Whether it is love songs about my heavenly father or love music about a mate. I love love and the idea of being in love and loving others. I am a happy ending, glass half full type of girl. Hopeful romantic.

I am so thankful for grace because religion will have you cut out all music that isn't "gospel" when in actuality a lot of the so called "gospel" music isn't gospel. If it isn't talking about Jesus and what he did for us or who we are in him then it can't be classified as "gospel". LOL It can be classified inspirational, but not "gospel".

So back to telling you about me. I am a woman on a journey. Discovering who I am, who I was created to be, The REAL me. I have so many roles, but I am learning that if I allow God into every area of my life, share everything with him, not just the spiritual stuff, BUT everything.........only then I can really experience HIM as God. If we just give our good sides our so called "holy" sides to God then we don't fully get to experience him as God and we miss out on the best part of Him. The loving, always accepting, forgiving, patient side of him. Forgiveness is freeing. Acceptance is freeing and I am enjoying that freedom.

Life doesn't happen within the four walls of a church. Life happens everyday and if we think that the only way we can have relationship with God is when we are praying or doing something that is so called "holy".... then we miss out on so much with him.

So right now I am at a place where I am enjoying life. Things don't always happen as I expected but God is always there with me bringing about good in my life. I am taking time to be grateful and enjoy what he has blessed me with. I also discovered something about myself which I will share on the next blog post......for now I was answering the question WHO AM I? Well I am ME. Loved by God and forgiven. And that's the best place I can be. :-)

Forever Forgiven

I decided to start blogging. Basically to express my thoughts, and because I believe my life is ministry. I believe I can encourage others as God encourages me. So........ that's why I am blogging. First let me tell you a little about myself. To know me is to know that I love God. He is very important to me and has been for a very long time. Before you freak out or tune me out......you need to know that I am not preachery and am not interested in being fake or wearing a facade. I will be the real me and allow others to see that God loves us just as we are. We don't have to pretend with him or for others.

Having a relationship with God or as you will hear me refer to him as (The Father) is not AT all about what SO many people make it about. We try to put God in a box and put all these rules on a relationship with him. I am threw with that. I used to do that but since I have learned about grace and exactly what Jesus accomplished for me on the cross, I no longer relate to God like that. The point of this blog is to allow you to view a relationship between a girl and her heavenly father. You will see me just as I am and see HIM in my life just as he is. You may think this will be boring but I promise it won't. If you allow me I will take you on a journey as God does some AMAZING things in my life.

I titled this post "FOREVER FORGIVEN", because no matter where I find myself and what kind of day I have had.....whether I've done most things right or not many things right that day. I am right now and will always be forever forgiven and for that I am grateful. I am grateful for Jesus because he made a way for me to have relationship with the father regardless of what I have done. And boy do I NEED that. My soul needs that. So come on and go with me as we explore life through the eyes of a girl who is FOREVER FORGIVEN!!! :-)

I decided to start blogging. Basically to express my thoughts, and because I believe my life is ministry. I believe I can encourage others as God encourages me. So........ that's why I am blogging. First let me tell you a little about myself. To know me is to know that I love God. He is very important to me and has been for a very long time. Before you freak out or tune me out......you need to know that I am not preachery and am not interested in being fake or wearing a facade. I will be the real me and allow others to see that God loves us just as we are. We don't have to pretend with him or for others.

Having a relationship with God or as you will hear me refer to him as (The Father) is not AT all about what SO many people make it about. We try to put God in a box and put all these rules on a relationship with him. I am threw with that. I used to do that but since I have learned about grace and exactly what Jesus accomplished for me on the cross, I no longer relate to God like that. The point of this blog is to allow you to view a relationship between a girl and her heavenly father. You will see me just as I am and see HIM in my life just as he is. You may think this will be boring but I promise it won't. If you allow me I will take you on a journey as God does some AMAZING things in my life.

I titled this post "FOREVER FORGIVEN", because no matter where I find myself and what kind of day I have had.....whether I've done most things right or not many things right that day. I am right now and will always be forever forgiven and for that I am grateful. I am grateful for Jesus because he made a way for me to have relationship with the father regardless of what I have done. And boy do I NEED that. My soul needs that. So come on and go with me as we explore life through the eyes of a girl who is FOREVER FORGIVEN!!! :-)